Being you

As I see it, a huge threat to being in balance is the struggle faced being true to yourself. There are so many influencers on an individual every day that impact how someone feels about something, but in the end the feeling that matters most is your own.

If you are like most people, you want people to like/love you, so it’s easy to honor other people’s wants and desires over your own, for example putting the feelings of your partner, children, boss/co-worker before your own.

In the end, you end up paying a higher cost to your life’s state of balance by ignoring your true feelings and instincts. Most times when you don’t honor how you feel it ends up coming out (normally quite sideways) and does more harm to your state of balance than if you’d taken the difficult path and honored your feelings in the first place.

So why then do we cause ourselves harm and emotional hardship by ignoring our true wants and desires? Why then do we do things we know we shouldn’t do or don’t want to do, make commitments we know we are not going to keep or say things we don’t actually mean?

I think we do it because managing the internal balance between horning what’s right for yourself and supporting those around you is one of the most difficult things we as humans do. There is no guidebook, and there is no support or encouragement for this behavior as we grow up from our families or society at large. We are taught to please people that ego is negative and there is a very thin line between confidence and conceit.

The part that is most amazing to me is that say for example your partner/spouse treated your emotions with such lack of regard, constantly not listening to you saying one then doing another time and time again; most of us would end that relationship. So why then we do tolerate such disrespect from ourselves?