Making it Work

I’ve started this entry about 10 times now. I want to say so many things and at the same time I’m so over talking, writing and thinking about balance as it applies to my silly little drama. I need a balance break.

I see people at work way more senior then I spread so thin I wonder who’d they be without work. I see how they only fill their lives with work – all night, every weekend, all the time. I see how they look down on those with children as under achievers, and make snide comments when a parent makes a balance choice. I hear the rude remarks and it’s disgusting.

I see a friend with 3 young children face cancer for the second time and struggle with the need to hang on to his benefits to afford treatment knowing work takes precious time away from his family. I see self employed friends and family fight just as hard to build a business and make time for each other as any corporate working stiff.

And I see myself letting go, giving in to the notion my experiment with my company has already failed. I’ve given up on the hope that I can be in balance and work for a company that is out of balance. I just don’t like the way it feels so it doesn’t matter if it’s possible or not. It’s like being a vegetation chef in a steak house kitchen – why would anyone do that? And any curiosity around if it could work for the sake a good essay or two – is long gone.

I pulled the trigger a few weeks ago and now the gun is going off – I’m starting a consulting business and I want to keep this dialog going. My intent is to tell other people’s stories here – not the doom gloom of too many hours and e-mail overload but the positive solutions and ideas from people who are making it work. Because it can work it – you just have to want it to.